How long to stay at MISERABLE new job
I'm in my late 20s and just started the second job of my career -- not by choice, but because I got downsized by my former employer. I loved my job had had been there for 5 years.
I live in an area of the country with a very depressed economy, so it was tough to find another job (luckily, my old employer gave me a nice severance to tide me over). I had several offers after a 4-month search, but in the end, went with a very high-paying, promising job at a very large company that everyone here has probably heard of. Great salary, great benefits, nice office, etc.
3 months into my job, I am miserable. I've been working 60-hour weeks and my boss literally reminds me of Meryl Streep's character in the Devil Wears Prada. She yells, makes unreasonable demands, and is a complete b*tch. At 28 years old, I do not deserve to be YELLED at by my boss! I cry every day on the way home from work and my relationship with my hubby is strained because I'm so depressed. It has given my self-esteem a serious hit. I've had demanding jobs before and can handle a lot, but this is ridiculous.
The question is not whether I'm going to quit. I KNOW I'm going to quit. My question is how long I should wait. I can't afford to quit without another job, and because of the economy here (can't sell my house), it will take quite awhile to find another position in the area. The thing is, I don't want a gap on my resume, so part of me is thinking I should just wait it out for a year so I can at least put this job on my resume, even if I don't use my boss as a reference.
Any advice on waiting out a miserable job for resume purposes? Is it worth it?
Wow, are you working for my old boss? LOL. Seriously, you sound just like me a few years ago. In my opinion, no job is ever worth being miserable and depressed and damaging your relationship with your spouse. Of course, unemployment would probably have all those side effects too.
I say, what you do depends on your ability to make the best of it, use stress-reducing techniques, and find a way to laugh at your boss (not to her face). And remember this is just a job and it's not forever. And leave work at work--absolutely refuse to spend your free time thinking about work problems. If you can do those things, stick it out and count it as a learning experience. If you can't, start looking for a new job and take a pay cut if you have to. In my case I found a new job, took a huge pay cut, and worked my way up to my old pay within a couple of years.
A lot of employers will understand the words, "The job wasn't what I thought it would be, and it just wasn't a fit for me." Everybody has been there.
GOOD LUCK!!
Sounds to me like you want validation over your indecision/procrastination. Typical for women.
If things are as bad as you say, the answer is simple, go find another job comparable to money, benefits, and say adios.
If you're worried about finances, you should save as much as you think you need, for as long as you suspect unemployment will last then hit the road. If you don't yet have financial security, then you know you'll have to grin and bear it for however many weeks, months, or years.
Lastly, as far as the resume' gap is concerned, it goes with the territory. Unemployment has no guarantees, wether it's how long you're unemployed or how it will look to prospective employers.
FYI. I would suggest not listening to the male poster on this thread. He has shown to have a major gripe about women in general on these forums. Plus he's been unemployed for over three years because he quit a job and is irresponsible with his money (i.e. major debt).
If you can't afford to quit, then you have to stay until you find something else. If that's a week, great, if that's a year, then you need to find a way to deal with it in the meantime. Get busy with your job search so that it can be as short as possible.
Tess
Sorry to hear about your job situation. I've been in a similar situation(strained marriage, poor self-esteem and all). First, the 60 hour week is probably to be expected if you are at a high-paying job at a large company. I would love it if I could keep my work week to 60 hours (but the money is great, so I'm hanging in there)! Nasty bosses are not fun, but perhaps she is suffering from unusual stress of her own. I had a manager who was like that, and I finally had enough guts to ask him why he felt the need to yell at everyone. Turns out that he was so stressed out himself that he didn't realize how it was making him act and affecting the whole office. Once it was brought to his attention and he found a way to address it, things got 100% better. In fact, he even said he respected me more for having the guts to stand up to him. Now we have a great working relationship.
Definitely don't quit until you have something else lined up. I briefly toyed with that idea at my current job, but discarded it. I made a decision to leave work at work and focus on things I like to do when I get home. Thinking about it constantly makes it so much worse. I started treating myself to massage therapy every other week as well and joining a yoga class. It helps sooooo much!
Also consider other opportunities you can move into at the company if you wait out the situation for a year. I think everyone has a crappy boss at some point in their life, so its just a matter of getting through it. I know its hard, but try not to let her intimidate you. Network within the company, but DON'T bad mouth your boss. Find out as much as you can about areas you might like to work in and build allies.
Good Luck!
RG,
I don't know if this will work for you or not. When I was looking to escape a really terrible job (a long while ago) I would remind myself every day that I was going to be leaving and that what I was seeing really had no importance for me anymore.
When you look at any terrible situation in this way, you remove yourself in a way from the incessant punishment being meted out from the source. It just doesn't matter as much since you have plans and are acting on a goal.
The threats, the bull, the insane and idiotic behavior has less of an impression on you and pretty soon you end up not even being concerned about it anymore. This also works for bad relationships, evil people, you name it.
Make your plans and don't slow down until you escape. Life is not meant to be endless punishment and full of dread. If it is, change it. You were not born to suffer--no one is.