better sex life
I work in a profession thats about 95% female, and Ive heard people make comments like "she needs a hard stiff one, she'd be so much easier to work with". lol, I kid you not. Are the people "gettin it" at home, much happier and more productive?
of course they're happier
Come on this is really an it depends question that can be answered any number of ways.
Are people who are in healthy relationships with active sex lives over all happier in their everyday lives? Of course they are. That should be a given. Why would we even need to ask the question.
Are women who are unhappy with their professional or personal lives in need of a "hard stiff one" to improve their overall productivity or happiness? Why no they are not. Having sex with a male will not improve a woman's life. Matter of fact having unfulfilling sex with a faceless male will likely not only not improve her life but simply cause other problems such as low self-esteem, fear of possible STD's, fear of unwanted pregnancy, fear of stalker; just to name of few.
Faceless sex does not improve anything, even temporarily. Despite what we have all been led to believe by the media; sex without emotional connection is simply a temporary physical "fix" that for women rarely even results in orgasm. Doesn't improve a thing for us; rarely even results in a energy release. Simply proves that we are capable of getting male attention - so what.
The fact that men believe that they have the panacea dangling between their legs for what ails women is not surprising but it is pathetic. The reality is that women can get that fix from something that is battery operated without the drama that comes with men and their massive egos. This way is cleaner, cheaper, emotion free, and always results in a physical release - something that men with their little dangling parts and big egos cannot guarantee.
So the answer to your question is yes people in healthy relationships are undoubtedly happier overall and thus likely to be more productive in their professional life. As to the rest - simply put - BS.
Hey LVal,
I don't think I have panacea for what ails women 'dangling', but I know there's nothing like taking old one eye to the optometrist to improve my mood.
Actually, what some women seem to appreciate is some attention, a good listener who's really interested in her. I found long ago that staring into her eyes works better than talking to her cleavage and knowing what color her eyes are when you call her the next day is crucial.
Yes knowing what color her eyes are is nice. Remembering what she said is also nice. Being able to hold a conversation with a person is better than anything....the ability to actually say good night at the door what a gift. Dinner and a movie without expectations of sack time.....what a gift. An evening on the porch with a nice bottle of wine. Flowers. A walk on the beach. A great joke that doesn't have underlying sexual innuendos. Shared interests other than what color your sheets are. Doing a favor without an expectation of a return.
I don't know NS, I must be jaded these days. It just seems to me that people (men and women) have forgotten how to be nice to each other just to be nice. How to get to know each other before they jump each others bones. How to hold hands; give a great hug; look into each others eyes; talk.
OMG LVal, thank you for so eloquently stating my exact thoughts. I cannot count the number of times men have suggested or implied that I could be "fixed" and my life would be ideal if I just got laid. If that was indeed the ticket to happiness, I could be living in an earthly version of heaven....according to them. I would only add the ever present danger of violence to your list of reasons not to......
If it was that easy to find happiness, our world would be a very safe, happy place indeed. It isn't. I cannot recall the last time I met an available man with whom I could enjoy an intellectually interesting conversation, as opposed to those whose hands I am repeatedly prying off of my thigh. One grows weary of rejecting clumsy, inept attempts to give you the time of your life. Yeah, being groped is a real turn-on.
LVal,
I'm taking notes here.
I grow my own roses, what color is your favorite? Myself, I like yellow, but I'm betting you got for red and white. I have several Chicago Peace plants, they're yellow with a pink blush.
The dinner and a movie sounds great, just don't make me watch 'Terms of Endearment'. As far as the sack time, I just try to make it available, no pressure.
I've know a couple of women who've told me thay're offended if a guy doesn't at least make the offer.
Whoa guys, "panacea for whats ails/going to the optometrist'" those are some new ones! I kinda took 'hard stiff one' to be metaphor for relationship. Definitely frivolous sex with strangers is unhealthy, dangerous, and emotionally destructive. The joke/comment was coming from married women, not sexist men. It was directed toward a woman who is late 40s and never been married. Im not sure if never having been married is a meaningful statistic, but her last relationship wasnt that great. He was a handsome guy, who lived in his mother's basement because he spent all his money on italian suits. But she seemed to be happier during that period (and consequently easier to deal with). Ironically, I just found out this person is leaving---she got a supervisor position at another hospital. I was shocked at the cold responses to her departure, mostly gladness. She has been here a whopping 28 years.
LV, its funny you mentioned the 'electronic devices', I recently witnessed a huuuuge debate on another board between women who take their devices with them on vacation versus the women who go out of town and have one-night-stands.
Actually I love the Lavender ones; but I am Texas girl so bring me the Yellow Rose just to acknowledge my roots.
Take off all but one of the thorns on each of the stems to acknowledge me as a woman and you will have my heart!
Whether the comment comes from men or women is not relevent. The fact that the comment is made at all is sad. The idea that emotionaless sex is the cure all for happiness is pitiful.
Personally, I was celibate for years (10 to be exact). Worked hard. Raised my teenage sons. Had a great circle of friends. Was happy with my life. Missed male companship but was unwilling to settle; I wanted it all! Relationships are never easy and I didn't have the time or energy to devote to one. Met my current husband when I wasn't looking and least expected it.